Fear is one of the biggest obstacles in business and in life. Most of the time, we avoid what we are afraid of, and miss out on great opportunities. What if you could change that?
For example, I was really afraid the first time I had to fire someone at my business. I hate confrontation and I was so afraid that I chickened out. I let that employee keep working until they finally left on their own, even though we had a lot of customer complaints and it was bad for business.
The second time, I faced my fear. It was an HR issue and I had no choice. I rehearsed what I was going to say ahead of time, and surprisingly it went far better than I expected. While I still felt bad about firing anyone, it was the right thing to do for the business.
Fast forward a few years and a few more firings, and I have conquered my fear. I actually felt good the last time I had to fire someone. It was a new employee, who came in with a bad attitude and lazy work ethic. After giving her coaching and a few chances, it was clear that she was bringing down the rest of the team. It was a simple decision, painless process, and the right thing to do for the business. I felt good that I stood up for my business and the rest of my team.
Conquering fear is one of the most powerful tools of any entrepreneur. When you get good at recognizing fear and beating it, it becomes fun!
Understanding F. E. A. R.
My favorite definition of fear is that it’s “False Evidence Appearing Real.”
Fear is a strong emotional response to a threat. It comes from an evolutionary response to real dangers. However, unless there is a tiger chasing you right now, that threat is usually something that you imagine could happen in the future. It hasn’t happened, and in fact there is a good chance that it will never happen.
Unfortunately most people’s response to fear is usually to avoid the situation completely. They are afraid to ask out that boy/girl in high school, so they never try. They are afraid of looking stupid, so they avoid that networking event where they could meet their next client. They are afraid of failure, so they never start a business. In the end, they settle for mediocrity and miss many opportunities to live a great life!
How We Handle Fear
There are three ways to handle fear:
- Avoid it completely. This is the most common response. Live a sheltered life and never try anything out of the ordinary. Definitely don’t be an entrepreneur! Please stop reading this blog if you prefer to take this approach, and I suggest to hide under your desk in case an asteroid falls on your house.
- Mitigate the risks. Think about the worst outcome, and think of ways that you can avoid it. This is useful when the thing you are afraid of is out of your control, like a recession or a key employee leaving.
- Overcome your fear. Face your fear, learn new skills, and expand your comfort zone so that it stops being something you are afraid of. This is useful when your fear is something that’s out side your comfort zone, but in your control, such as a fear of public speaking or that you’re not good enough to succeed.
Mitigating Fear
This process works best when the fear is something that’s out of your control, such a key employee leaving. Here is an easy process to mitigate fear:
- Identify your fear and write it down. Specifically, what can go wrong? Write this in the first person, with as much detail as possible. For example, “I’m afraid of losing a key employee. Bob, because he handles all my marketing. His mother is sick and he wants to move to Seattle to take care of her.”
- Brainstorm solutions to stop or lessen the damage, should this event occur. Write these down. For example: “1. Pay Bob more, so that he can’t afford to leave. 2. Spend time with Bob to understand what he’s doing with marketing so that I can carry it forward if he leaves. 3. Hire someone right away to learn what Bob does and take over his work. 4. Let Bob work remotely.”
- Pick the best solutions and write them out as a positive affirmation. For example, “If Bob leaves, I will let him work remotely to carry on his work while I hire someone to take his place.”
- Remember, fear is usually of things that haven’t happened yet! So you may not need any of these solutions, but now you have them in your back pocket in case you need them. You can even implement one as a pre-emptive strike, to keep your fear from happening.
Overcoming Fear
This process works best when your fear is something that’s outside your comfort zone, such as a fear of public speaking or a fear of failure. Here is a simple process to overcome your fear:
- Write down what you are afraid of. Write it in the first person, so that you own it. For example, “I’m afraid of going to networking events because I feel awkward.”
- Brainstorm ways you can improve your skills and expand your comfort zone to conquer your fear. For example, “I can read blogs or a book on making small talk, and practice asking questions. I can come up with a slick 30-second pitch to describe my business with passion. I can go to a Toastmaster meeting where I can practice speaking in front of others until I’m comfortable.”
- Now imagine the new you who’s conquered this fear. Write this down, using the first person and present tense, such as “I love going to networking events because I get to learn so much about people.”
- Take action! Pick something small to start, such as Google “how to make small talk” or “toastmasters near me.”
Now You Try
Think about your biggest fear as an entrepreneur. What’s holding you back? Now decided whether you want to mitigate or overcome this fear. Follow the process and write the results in the comments.
There is no judgment here! The only way to move forward is to move forward.
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